Tag Archives: relationships

The Human Family Community Open Threads {100} ~ What Does The Ideal Romantic Relationship Look Like To You?

Welcome to “The Human Family Community Open Threads,” a project open for anyone who would like to express their feelings, make friends or talk about anything; if you feel suicidal, depressed, anxious or lonely during these times this project is here for you. Feel free to leave a comment below and connect, let’s start a conversation. No judgement, we don’t know until we walk in someone else’s shoes..

~DiosRaw, 08/07/21

The Human Family Crash Course Series {5} ~ Communication {8} ~ How To Stop Your Emotional Brain Taking Over

Welcome fellow souls to « The Human Family Crash Course Series, » a new project collaborated together by empress2inspire.blog and diosraw0.wordpress.com. Together we will be working on a different topic for each crash course; our fifth topic is focused on «Communication.» Each topic will have eight posts with posts on Mondays and Thursdays. We hope you enjoy our series and we look forward to knowing how our posts have inspired you!

Within one’s lives, the individuals belonging to various age groups, categories and backgrounds experience positive as well as negative emotions. Happiness is regarded as a positive emotion, whereas, the psychological problems of anger, frustration, stress, depression, anxiety, trauma, and pride are regarded as negative emotions. When these feelings impose barriers within the course of implementation of communication processes, it is regarded as positive emotional barriers and negative emotional barriers. The positive emotional barriers are happiness and negative emotional barriers are anger, frustration, stress, depression, anxiety, trauma, and pride. The individuals need to be well-aware in terms of methods, approaches and strategies, which are necessary in overcoming emotional barriers. When the individuals are pursuing higher education or training programs or are engaged in employment opportunities in reputed organizations, they are well-aware that when they need to communicate with their instructors, supervisors, or employers, they need to depict decency and exercise control on emotional barriers. On the other hand, when communication takes place in an informal manner among fellow students or colleagues, then in some cases, emotional barriers may take place. But the individuals need to ensure that they communicate with each other happily and should not let the psychological problems of anger, frustration, stress, depression, anxiety, trauma, and pride impede the communication processes.

It is of utmost significance for the individuals to overcome emotional barriers in effective communication. The reason being, when they will generate awareness in terms of measures, which are necessary in overcoming emotional barriers to effective communication, they will carry out this task in a well-organized manner. It is necessary for the individuals to augment their understanding in terms of ways to keep a healthy mind-set. When the mind-sets of the individuals are healthy, they are able to overcome emotional barriers as well as carry out their tasks and functions in a satisfactory manner. The measures to overcome emotional barriers in effective communication and in implementing one’s tasks and activities in an appropriate manner are stated as follows:

~ Develop Positive Thinking

Development of positive thinking is regarded as one of the important ways of augmenting one’s communication skills and forming sociable terms and relationships with others. When the individuals develop positive thinking, they will be able to alleviate the emotional barriers to effective communication. When the individuals are dedicated towards the pursuance of career goals, they need to develop positive thinking in terms of the individuals as well as the working environmental conditions. This will enable the individuals to develop motivation and interest towards the implementation of their job duties as well as in promoting effective communication with others. Therefore, it can be stated, development of positive thinking is one of the crucial measures of overcoming emotional barriers to effective communication.

~Get Engaged in Physical Activities

Getting in various types of physical activities is regarded as one of the indispensable ways of alleviating stress as well as other psychological problems of anxiety, depression, anger and frustration. The various types of physical activities that the individuals get engaged in are, walking, running, cycling, and so forth. It is recommended that for about 20 to 30 minutes, at least thrice a week, one should get engaged in physical activities. This measure will not only enable the individuals to maintain good health, but they are also able to alleviate psychological problems and promote effective communication with others. Therefore, it can be stated, getting engaged in physical activities is one of the important measures of overcoming emotional barriers to effective communication.

~ Consume Healthy and Nutritious Diet

Consumption of a healthy and nutritious diet is regarded to be of utmost significance for the individuals to stay healthy physically as well as psychologically. It is comprehensively understood that the diet that the individuals consume renders a significant contribution in framing their mind-sets. When the individuals consume a healthy and nutritious diet, they are not only able to maintain good health, but also are able to enhance their concentration on various tasks and activities. When they concentrate on tasks and functions, they will be able to overcome barriers to effective communication. Therefore, it can be stated, consuming a healthy and nutritious diet is one of the vital measures of overcoming emotional barriers to effective communication.

~ Mediate

In recent years, the technique of meditation has acquired significance to a major extent. This technique is prevalent since ancient times and it is comprehensively understood that when individuals put into operation this technique, they will develop a calm mind-set and learn to exercise control on psychological problems. Research has indicated, when the individuals are engaged in jobs, which are demanding and tedious, they in some cases feel work pressure, stress and anxiety, but when they practice meditation, they are not only able to alleviate the feelings of stress and anxiety, but also are able to promote healthy mind-sets. Therefore, it can be stated, meditating is regarded as one of the indispensable measures of overcoming emotional barriers to effective communication.

~ Maintain High Levels of Mental Activity

The individuals, belonging to various age groups, categories and backgrounds need to maintain high levels of mental activity. Maintaining high levels of mental activity is referred to having active mind-sets. In order to accomplish this purpose, the individuals need to get engaged in tasks and activities, which promotes active mind-sets and well-being. The individuals need to get engaged in tasks and activities, which would help them to stay healthy and active. When the individuals maintain high levels of mental activity, they are able to overcome the psychological problems of anger, frustration, stress, depression, anxiety, trauma and eliminate emotional barriers to effective communication. Therefore, maintaining high levels of mental activity is one of the crucial measures of overcoming emotional barriers to effective communication.

~ Do Brain Training

Brain training is referred to participating in tasks and activities, which enable the individuals to bring about improvements in analytical and problem solving skills (Roche, 2014). When the individuals are pursuing educational programs or are engaged in employment opportunities in organizations, they need to develop analytical and problem solving skills. When the individuals experience problems and are unable to provide solutions to them, they feel stressed and anxious. Hence, brain training will render a significant contribution in providing solutions to problems as well as in honing one’s analytical and problem solving skills. This will also contribute in overcoming emotional barriers to effective communication. Therefore, doing brain training is regarded as one of the fundamental measures of overcoming emotional barriers to effective communication.

The measures to overcome emotional barriers in effective communication and in implementing one’s tasks and activities in an appropriate manner are, get engaged in physical activities, consume healthy and nutritious diet, maintain good terms and relationships, develop positive thinking, acquire education and training, conduct research on regular basis, mediate, acquire healthcare and medical treatment, maintain high levels of mental activity and do brain training. Finally, it can be stated, when the individuals will put into operation the measures in a satisfactory manner, they will not only carry out communication in an appropriate manner, but also render a significant contribution in enriching their overall quality of lives.

~Garima {Empress2Inspire}

Guest Posts {13} ~ Commitment Phobia

~This is a guest post from Anita ~ http://anitavij.com~

“I want a committed relationship, but I am afraid that I may get hurt.”

”Do you have commitment phobia”?
We have heard this phrase many times in our life. What does it mean when someone has commitment phobia?

To understand this, first we have to understand the meaning of commitment. The definition of a commitment is a promise or agreement to do something. An example of a commitment is marriage. Another example of commitment is going into business with someone.

Commitment is a dedication to a particular organization, cause, or belief, and a willingness to get involved.

If we talk about commitment in relationships, the main goal of commitment is for each party to feel some sense of security and control. When you are in a contract, you feel comfortable and have some expectations from your partner.

While doing business with a partner or working for an organization, you will need commitment, initiative and desire to succeed.

Commitment is a choice. If the thought of it gets you panicked, you have to introspect to understand why. Fear to commit is called commitment phobia. Commitment phobia can impact your ability to commit to anything, leave apart just relationships. It can include fear of deep friendship or reluctance to commit to a job or to your own financial wellbeing.

We have to look for the reasons behind commitment phobia. In relationships, this can be hidden in some childhood incident such as parent’s divorce or marital problems. It may also be some other past unsuccessful relationships that are still haunting one and stopping from making the commitment. So, the past experiences that instil a sense of fear or passive avoidance of ending up in an unsatisfying relationship can result in commitment phobia.

As dating and relationship expert and author Laura Bilotta explains, “commitment issues can stem from a number of experiences, including early childhood traumas and recent relationship history, and these commitment phobias can keep you from having happy and healthy relationships moving forward.”

Job commitment phobia or fear of committing to a working partner is another cause of suffering for many. It may be considered a form of social phobia or performance phobia.

Clinical psychologist Dr Abigael San agrees pointed out that although it’s not a diagnosable condition, commitment-phobia is definitely real: “There’s a scale, people have it to different extents,” she says.

Just to add humor to this serious subject, I would like to give an example from a Bollywood movie.

In Shuddh Desi Romance, Rishi Kapoor donning a dhoti and pagdi as a small-town wedding planner-cum-wedding bandowner asks the hero a simple question: “Tum ladke ladkiya Pehle Ek doosre ke peechhe bhagate ho, aur phir ek doosre se door bhagate ho. Main shaadi karwaoon toh kiski? (young boys and girls, you first run after each other and then run away from each other. Who will I help get married?)” The hero Raghu, a Jaipur tourist guide replies with a straight face: “Marriages are passe. Look for other business options.” The conversation pretty much sums up the mood of a new generation that seems increasingly reluctant about steady commitment in relationships, particularly marriage.😇😇

For most people relationships come naturally to life as breathing or making a meal. But for some, however, relationships are not that easy. People with commitment issues, commitment phobia or relationship anxiety generally have a serious problem staying in a relationship or a job for substantially long periods of time. While they can feel love like anyone else, the feeling of losing their partner drives anxiety in them and the hesitation to commit sets in.

What can be done about commitment issues:

Let’s explore ways of dealing with it effectively.

Like most emotional and psychological struggles, there is no “quick fix” or “cure” for intense relationship anxiety or commitment phobia. By exploring your personal experiences, beliefs, fears, and wants/needs you can open yourself up to the possibility of a change. Learning to understand these areas about yourself and your life helps to re-frame or shift your mindset to build a healthier future deeply set in emotions, connection, and relationships.

First of all, you have to find the root cause of this phobia. Introspect and you may spot the cause, perhaps set in a previous life experience, which is stopping you from committing.

If you happen to find the cause, know that bad experiences are a part of life. If you experienced trauma or torture in the past, it’s hard, however, it’s not the end of the life. Give yourself another chance, life may throw pleasant surprises at you and it all may come back on track.

Everyone does face failures and unwanted situations in life, some more than others. However, giving life another shot is a choice we must all make.

Some tend to set the cause of their lack of commitment in experiences that they never encountered first-hand, but their near- and dear ones did. If you have seen your friend or relative being cheated by a business partner, that doesn’t mean that the same will happen to you too. The same applies to a romantic relationship or other forms of commitments. Don’t hesitate to pursue opportunities to commit in your life just because some others around you encountered unfortunate negative experiences.

If you just went through a breakup, be it a marriage or a business partnership, take a break and give it some time to heal. Time is the biggest healer.

Don’t hesitate to seek professional help. Many people face difficult situations in their life and professional counselling and assistance goes a long way in recovery. Think deeply about this option and discuss with those around you who deeply care for your wellbeing.

I love this quote by Neil Strauss,” Without commitment, you cannot have depth in anything, whether it’s a relationship, or business or a hobby.”

Commitment is the price one pays for the longevity of relationships, and after all, when it all works out, it’s a price well worth it.

I wish your commitments find their anchor and bring the best to your well-deserving lives!!

None of the blogs or opinions expressed within is meant as advice to you or anybody else on any matter, including but not limited to, personal finance, health, or other matters of life. If you need advice, speak to a professional!

~To see more of this writer’s work ~ http://anitavij.com~

~To guest post feel free to share over your post by going to this blog’s connect page to find my email.~

Poetry {67} ~ PRIMAL ECHOS VULCANISE

When the tenderness between you vulcanises

Mimicking one another in the script of incapacitate

When the silence and opulence has become raw and shred

May you discern again the primal echo of your melody

When the weave of affection initiates to unravel

And vexation seeps in to burn the ground betwixt you

Prior this spell of grief incites

The sour seed of bitterness to take root

May your souls transpire to kiss

So seemingly adjacent, yet so far asunder

When you unintentionally and intentionally fragmented each other’s hearts

She can’t seem to find the right articulations to get through the mirror

She could formulate a thousand expressions

Yet they would materalize senseless

Frantic to love

Toxicity oozes you to let go

All these anecdotes she’s never arised

Outstretch with sure hands

And digest the chalice of your love

He held her tightly in a jar

Afraid if unfastened she would run afar

A reunion of souls from a time when nothing else was or imagined to be

A merger of two familiar flames

Born not from new sparks emitted

But from old embers rekindled by some explicable knowing in hearts

That you two were acquainted before

You were destined to cross paths, no matter the distance between you, you’d return to each other again and again

They don’t know what it is, yet when they lock eyes, they see the reflection of their souls staring back through the universal window of being.

~DiosRaw, 18/05/21

The Human Family Crash Course Series {4} ~ Realtionships ~ Being Present In Relationships & Stop Zoning Out

Welcome fellow souls to « The Human Family Crash Course Series, » a new project collaborated together by empress2inspire.blog and diosraw0.wordpress.com. Together we will be working on a different topic for each crash course; our fourth topic is focused on «Relationships.» Each topic will have eight posts with posts on Mondays and Thursdays. We hope you enjoy our series and we look forward to knowing how our posts have inspired you!

Some of us frequently zone out or have our mind wander during conversations. Some space out to the point where they miss what the other person said, and they’re noticeably staring off into the distance. Others can use a section of their mind to follow the interaction and look like they’re listening, but another track in their brain is daydreaming, thinking of things they have to do later, or maybe even beating themselves up over past mistakes.. We all do this from time to time, now is the time to begin spending quality time in your relationships.

Here are some tips to help you zone-in during your interactions with friends and family:

Intend to focus on the conversation and not let your mind drift off. Your mind may waver a lot during conversations because you’re not trying to do any different. Make a conscious effort to stay focused on the people you’re talking to. If you catch yourself zoning out, switch your attention back to the interaction (without being too hard on yourself, show yourself some love).

Give yourself something foundational about the conversation to focus on. Tell yourself you’ll pay attention to the speaker’s eyes, facial expression, or tone of voice. Try different things to see if one works best for you. If you notice your thoughts have wandered, bring your attention back to your real world focal point you chose.

Set aside some time to let your mind wander before a conversation. If you’ve got a heavy mind, and know you have a social event later that day, do some deliberate zoning out beforehand. Lay down or go for a stroll and daydream as much as you want. It may clear some thoughts out of your mental queue and let you be more attentive when you see people later on.

Do what you can at the time to manage any feelings of social anxiety and insecurity. Anxiety and self-consciousness makes us want to retreat inward. One of the best things you can do for that is make a conscious effort to focus on the present moment and what’s going on outside of you. You can’t get caught up in your worries if you’re really paying attention to what the other person is saying. It can also help to take some slow, deep breaths and intentionally loosen any muscles you’ve been tensing unconsciously.

Do what you can to raise your energy, if you’re zoning out because you’re feeling mentally drained. Get up and move around, have a snack, do some breathing techniques, have a fruit smoothie. Maybe you could get up and use the bathroom, and give yourself a few minutes alone to recharge your batteries slightly.

Try not to jump to conclusions about people or what they’re going to say. Resist the temptation to think, “This co-worker always makes the same long-winded complaints about how ungrateful her kids are. I’m going to think about what I want to make for dinner until it’s over.” I’m not saying that if someone has certain conversation habits that they’ll always surprise you, but that you can’t be sure.

If you’re zoning out because you’re losing interest in the conversation, do what you can to make it more interesting. If a discussion is boring you, don’t be too quick to passively resign yourself to it and mentally check out. Maybe you can change the topic. Or if you’re listening to someone, you could inject your own opinions, so the conversation becomes more or a back and forth. If you’re having coffee with friends and everyone is losing steam, suggest getting up and going somewhere else to change the environment.

Try to put your spare mental energy into attending to other aspects of the conversation. If you can follow what everyone’s saying fairly easily, and that’s not enough to capture your full attention, try attending to things like analyzing their facial expressions or body language, or trying to figure out how what they’re talking about might make them feel. If someone is telling you about their problems, put all your effort into being the best listener you can be.

“Each friend represents a world in us, a world possibly not born until they arrive, and it is only by this meeting that a new world is born.” ~ Anais Nin, The Diary

~Amber {DiosRaw}

The Human Family Crash Course Series {4} ~ The Benefits Of Great Friendships & Relationships

Welcome fellow souls to « The Human Family Crash Course Series, » a new project collaborated together by empress2inspire.blog and diosraw0.wordpress.com. Together we will be working on a different topic for each crash course; our second topic is focused on «Relationships.» Each topic will have eight posts with posts on Mondays and Thursdays. We hope you enjoy our series and we look forward to knowing how our posts have inspired you!

“Friendship…is born at the moment when one man says to another “What! You too? I thought that no one but myself…” ~ C.S. Lewis

Here are some of the myriad of benefits when it comes to having healthy relationships:

Friends may extend your life. People who have strong social connections are less likely to die earlier than their potential than people who are isolated. According to a 2010 review of research, the effect of social ties on life span is twice as strong as that of exercising, and equivalent to that of quitting smoking.

Stronger immunity. Science has found a link between social support from friendship and the immune system. People with good friends tend to have stronger immune systems and anti-inflammatory responses that can lead to quicker wound healing and reduce the risk of illnesses, including cardiovascular disease, arthritis, and some cancers.

Lower stress. Researchers believe that friendship also plays a role in the way the body processes stress. When you spend time with your loved ones sharing what’s on your mind, your body may produce less of the stress hormone, cortisol, which can have a calming effect.

Increased wisdom. The quality friendships that you develop will gift you with blessings of lessons along the way which will enhance your wisdom if you listen out for them.

Self-growth. Not only does your friend grow in your connection, you do too. As time goes on, you will learn more about another’s life and this can help you develop into a beautiful person by listening to their stories, pain and experiences then learning from them.

Improved self-confidence. Supportive friends can help us feel more confident by offering praise, reassurance, and a hand to hold when we’re feeling unsure. Being there for each other in this way can help to develop a lifetime of gratifying companionship.

Increased happiness. To find joy in your life you can turn to your happy friends. Studies have shown that socializing with happy people can rub off on you. Research also says that you can amp up your happiness quotient by actively building friendships instead of waiting for them to come to you.

It teaches us to see the Creator in other people. The true test of friendship isn’t how you much you love someone when they are at their best, but how much you love them when they are at their worst. It is the purest form of loving thy neighbor as thyself. To love someone unconditionally is to love God. It is the ability to see the spark of the Creator in them. Every time we see negativity in someone else, we disconnect from the Creator, because we fail to understand that those traits are specifically designed by the Creator. When we love someone despite their faults, we connect to the Light of the Creator. Reaching this level of friendship is incredibly rare. To have even one friend that you love unconditionally is an enormous blessing.

It offers us opportunities to share. Loving someone unconditionally also means loving someone with no expectation of anything in return. We often expect things from other people – we want them to do favors for us, to give us their attention, to make us feel better about ourselves. But when we have a true friendship, we put aside our own selfish desires because of our love for them. Our spiritual work is designed to transform ourselves into more selfless, giving beings. The more we grow unconditional love for our friends through acts of sharing, the more we change ourselves into more spiritual people.

It helps us become more like the Creator. We are meant to ultimately become like the Creator, an endless source of sharing. With every step we take toward having genuine love, tolerance and human dignity for others, we align ourselves more and more with the unconditional love of the Creator. To love others unconditionally is to love them the way the Creator loves us. Think about how you can be a better friend to those around you. How can you be more giving, more selfless, and more unconditionally loving? The more we actively think about this and take steps towards building that kind of friendship, the more we transform ourselves and the world around us. This is the purpose of all our spiritual work and the reason friendship nourishes the soul.

Promotes positive behaviours. It’s common to pick up the habits of the company you surround yourself with, the beneficial effects friends and family can have on your behavior can be as simple as encouraging you to eat better and sleep more. The opposite is also true, there is a greater likelihood of becoming a smoker if your friends pick up the habit.

Let us know below what benefits human relationships gift you..

~Amber {DiosRaw}

The Human Family Crash Course Series {4} ~ Relationships ~ The Ten Golden Rules Of Letting Go

Welcome fellow souls to «The Human Family Crash Course Series,» a new project collaborated together by empress2inspire.blog and diosraw0.wordpress.com. Together we will be working on a different topic for each crash course; our second topic is focused on «Relationships.» Each topic will have eight posts with posts on Mondays and Thursdays. We hope you enjoy our series and we look forward to knowing how our posts have inspired you!

Letting go of painful memories and painful thoughts, harmful desires and unhealthy habits is the constructive path in life; it also means stop dwelling on the past or worrying about the future. Letting means detachment, the removal of attachments to anything that makes you suffer or unhappy.

In his book “The Universe Has a Plan” Matt Khan describes the 10 Golden Rules of Letting Go, as a way of returning to who we are.

Here are the ten golden rules of letting go:

Golden Rule #1 – “You Have Done Nothing Wrong.”

This is about self-compassion and compassion to others. Forgiveness opens many doors. We learn through our challenges, and he adds, “Once there is nothing that can happen in life to prevent the receiving of self-compassion, or restrict the offering of forgiveness, there is no further wisdom for adversity to teach you.“

Golden Rule #2 – Those Who Blame You are Unhappy

“The people who need forgiveness the most are those people who treat you the worst, because they are the most entrenched in their egos. They are actually begging for emotional healing by lashing out at you… Your emerging light can become so potent within your being that you begin observing the innocent beauty of all as reflections of your awakening soul.”

Golden Rule #3 – Hardships Can Be Fast-tracked Through Moments Of Thankfulness.

Mantra: “Thank you for this gift. Which suggests that everything we encounter is here to move us forward. “If at this moment I had everything I ever wanted, I’d feel exactly the same as I do right now.”

Golden Rule #4 – Feeling Better Helps Everyone heal. Your Happiness Neutralizes Their Pain.

“Feeling bad for other people feeling bad doesn’t help anyone feel better. But, daring to feel good about the uniqueness and innocence of others helps those who feel bad to accelerate their healing.”

Golden Rule #5 – Wellbeing Is A Signal That You Are Ready To Embody Your Potential.

“My breath is the living presence of well-being. The more mindfully I breathe, the more alive I feel.” Don’t underestimate the power of the breath to return us to our most centered and aligned selves.

Golden Rule #6 – The Universe Always Has a Plan

You aren’t sad because you are an unhappy person. You are experiencing sadness as part of your healing journey, to create space for more light to be embodied. You will receive everything you desire at exactly the moment in time it is meant to arrive.

There is a destiny. It is guaranteed, and it also requires your participation. It may include outcomes the ego may desire, but it can only be fulfilled by the light of your soul.

Golden Rule #7 – Everything Changes, But It Only Changes For The Better

“While the ego believes pleasure can exist only beyond the threshold of pain, the soul knows degrees of pain and pleasure often exist in the same exact space… I am able to see that everything changes me for the better, whenever I am still. Breathe in the challenges, and breath out whatever doesn’t serve us.”

Golden Rule #8 – It’s Ok To Dislike

“To use the internal experience of dislike as an opportunity to love and accept the part of myself shut down by the judgment of others… Dislike is the recognition that you are acknowledging something that seems foreign to your core values.”

Golden Rule #9 – Projecting Anger Drains You Of Energy

When dealing with anger we have choices, “Say something or walk away or… deal with anger with creativity – anger is the expression of unexpressed passion. Art/creativity is the outlet for the emotional body to be channeled. The inner artist says, ‘Here are the things I saw, felt, and survived, and here’s how it made me better.’ Art is the inner narrator of your soul’s evolution.”

Golden Rule #10 – Love is Your Liberator

“Once my needs became my hole to fill, I was freed from believing others were acting from any other motivation than the nature of their journey. This produced an inherent level of respect for each and every being, no matter how differently their actions were from mine. The love I required was no longer anyone else’s problem to resolve; as a result, the notion of problem began dissolving from view. I was no longer seeing burden, conflict, pressure, or stress, but a world of innocent hearts hiding from their own love by trying to get it from another…
When love is your liberator, it is only the love that you cultivate within your own heart that sets you free from any pain created by the conduct of others.”

“The truth is, unless you let go, unless you forgive yourself, unless you forgive the situation, unless you realize that the situation is over, you cannot move forward.” ~ Steve Maraboli

~Amber {DiosRaw}